RAW: Seth Rollins’ Personal Hell (5/4/15)

Standard

Just as Randy Orton declares he will walk away from Payback as the WWE World Heavyweight Champion, Roman Reigns makes his appearance and says he will get his payback on Seth Rollins and get the title.

It’s the veteran versus the young blood in ‘who gets to pummel Seth for the belt first’ match!

Enter New Day in the middle of the argument to try and get the negativity to stop…even though Randy leads the New Day sucks’ chants. Big E points out that it’s totally okay that Roman never won the big one and Seth has beaten Randy before. After getting the men riled up, they demand that Roman and Randy take on the New Day…

…From the orders of Kane! Interesting! Well, for the Universe it’s interesting, Randy and Roman just look like they got Punk’d and are waiting for Ashton Kutcher to slide out from under the ring.

New Day vs. Randy Orton, Roman Reigns

3×2 Handicap Match

New Day wins after Roman accidentally spears Randy, letting Kofi pin the Apex Predator for the win.

Roman and Randy work surprisingly well for a pair that will soon enough be facing each other at Payback. Perhaps that’s the twisted side in both of them that thoroughly enjoys the pain and misery they inflict upon New Day. Kofi’s new pigtails must have been a good luck charm for this match.

Kane enters at the end of the match. He sets up the main event to be Randy Orton against Roman Reigns for the sheer fact that he loves to exploit their growing hatred against each other.

Promo: Seth Rollins, Kane, J&J

Seth calls Kane the spoiled rotten kid who was horrible all year long and is trying to make amends with Santa the night before Christmas.

Uh? What? Pretty sure that’s Seth any day of the week. Besides, Kane doesn’t care for Santa, he was the kid that sat in the chimney with a blowtorch to roast his chestnuts.

To retaliate for Seth threatening to tell mommy and daddy on Uncle Kane, he makes a rematch for Seth Rollins against Dean Ambrose. With an added bonus, J&J will not be at ringside so they can’t interfere. Beautiful!

In Ring Promo: Goldberg Ryback and Renee

Renee asks why Ryback was the target and once again, Ryback hasn’t the slightest clue. What is going on!?

Bray appears on the screen, and does he explain what’s going on? No, but Ryback will be scared as hell apparently.

I really wish they wouldn’t keep asking Ryback why Bray is picking fights with him, because I feel like they’re never actually going to address that.

Tyson Kidd, Cesaro vs. The Ascension 

Tyson Kidd and Cesaro take the win!

Wow, The Ascension is alive! These Legion of Doom copy cats vow to be the new tag team champions. Well, in doing so, they have to take out a few other tag teams. Not being able to take out the former tag team champions does not bode well for them.

Promo: Renee and Seth Rollins

All Renee wants to know is what Seth’s reaction was to Kane setting up the match between himself and Dean Ambrose. Well, Seth calling Kane a moron is a good explanation.

Dean Ambrose vs. Seth Rollins

Before the match can even begin, Kane enters and says that if Dean beats him then Dean will enter the Main Event at Payback and it will become a Fatal Four-way. That does not please Seth in the slightest, who is so angry he professes that even Canada doesn’t matter! Well Damn.

You know the match is a success when not only there are ‘this is awesome’ but ‘holy shit’ chants as well. The two brothers have undeniable ring chemistry as they put on quite the show. Probably because there’s nothing quite as satisfying as trying to kill your brother in the ring. And the results are….

Dean Ambrose wins, making the Main Event at Payback a Fatal Four-Way

Promo: Kane, Seth Rollins, J&J

Seth is livid, and he even had the audacity to threaten to hurt Kane. The man just doesn’t understand that the more he speaks the more he ruins his chances at retaining the title!

Promo: Byron and Lana

How does it feel to be so loved by the Universe? Well, she pretends to think nothing of it…so Fandango swings by to tell her to accept the love and affection before he disappears just as Rusev enters. Of course, Rusev yells at her like the brute he is.

Rusev vs. Fandango

Rusev wins by submission. Well, this was interesting. Fandango seems to want to do all the dances with Lana, which does not work for Rusev. The Bulgarian Brute doesn’t want anyone near his precious Lana, but he still treats her like crap! This man is very, very confused.

R-Truth vs. Stardust

Stardust wins, with the help of fake spiders!

Kudos to Stardust for making a Star Wars reference (calling R-Truth a womp rat) on May the 4th! We also learn that Stardust loves spiders, as he carries an entire bag of fake spiders around.

John Cena and countless interruptions.

Just after John issues the open challenge, we are met with Bret the Hitman Heart here to introduce Cena’s opponent. However just as he’s trying to do the introduction, Heath Slater comes out. He’s just mad about getting attacked out of nowhere! So Bret attacks him out of nowhere to introduce the hometown challenger…. Sami Zayn

John Cena vs. Sami Zayn

Open Challenge for US title

John Cena wins against Sami Zayn.

Sami answers the challenge in his hometown, introduced by Bret the Hitman Heart, and it’s for the US title…what a way to debut on RAW for sure! Even getting hurt in the middle of the match, he continued on.  Like the seasoned competitors that challenged John before him, Zayn was able to kick out of an AA and even counter it. It took several finishers to put Sami away, even being injured.

Promo: Renee with New Day

Originally she was going to speak to Sami Zayn, but the New Day were too hyped up over their win! They’re just feeling so victorious, they want to make sure everyone knows it.

Their celebration is interrupted by Tyson, Cesaro, and Natalya. They insult their intelligence and drop some facts on these tag team champions before leading the glorious ‘New Day Sucks’ chants.

Nikki Bella vs. ….Never mind

Naomi and Tamina (welcome back girl) ambush the Bella twins before they even step inside the ring. The two women destroy them at ringside. They are not here for the Bella Twins dominating the Divas Division anymore.

Bad News Barrett, Sheamus vs. Neville, Dolph Ziggler

BNB wins after hitting Neville with the bull hammer, with some outside help from Sheamus.

Well this match was awfully personal, what with Dolph Ziggler giving Sheamus a busted eye at King of the Ring last week. Then there’s BNB who’s just happy to be there and be king. Oh, plus he wants to be the only dominant English-man, so there’s that bit of personal vendetta against Neville.

Roman Reigns vs. Randy Orton

Once again before the match can start, Kane decides to interrupt. As announced by Jamie, the secret weapon of the authority, Kane is the special guest ring enforcer. Seth is the special guest commentator, while Jamie is the announcer and Joey the timekeeper.

How precious.

When the match officially starts, Roman tries to convince Randy that they’re all there to get rid of them, and that they should just take them out now. Randy however, does not agree with Roman’s reasoning and instead decides to deliver the RKO which leads to the actual match starting. I think he’s still a little upset that he was speared earlier on in the night. All the while poor Seth is complaining on commentary that everything is so unfair and the odds are stacked against him. Honestly he’s just tired of all the effort of proving himself. It’s so strenuous.

Kane trips Roman once Randy is out of the ring, allowing for the beat down the Authority had planned all along. Roman tries to help Randy (how noble) but it’s too much for the two men, as it’s 4×2.

Enter Dean Ambrose who’s gunning right for Seth before helping to take out the rest of the crew. Seth is the last one left in the ring, facing a vicious spear as he ‘s cornered by everyone. Roman is then RKO’ed by Randy. Dean is angry that Randy would do that to his brother, so as revenge he hits him with dirty deeds.

That leaves Dean as the last man standing. Possible glimpse into what the outcome will be at Payback? Or is this just a cruel joke? There’s no way they’ll have Seth drop the title this quickly, especially if he’s supposed to be the future of the WWE.

Also, why wasn’t there a divas match? I get that Tamina and Naomi took out the Bella twins….but it wasn’t even like that took them a while. The entire ordeal surprisingly took less time to get through than a Diva’s match. So, what’s going on? Is it because someone out there doesn’t know how to write a Divas storyline aside from making them all angry, catty teenage girls? That sounds like an issue that should be addressed.

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s