RAW: Comedy Hour! (7/27/15 Highlights)

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Now the WWE has seen quite a busy Monday morning. A trailer for WWE 2K16 involving the one, the only, the Terminator himself. Not only that, but a trailer for 12 Rounds 3: Lockdown starring the one and only Dean Ambrose emerged as well.

You know what that means. This can either be a busy and very dramatic night, or one full of commercials.

Highlights

Seth’s face when John Cena’s music starts.

I feel you Seth. We all make that face when we hear his music. Sure, not lately as he’s had good matches but now that he’s back in the main title scene….yes, yes we are all back to making that face.

Stephanie cheers the crowd on for wanting a champion vs. champion match on RAW for Seth’s title.

Then tells them ‘no, no, no’ before saying John must earn it. Oh dear, I really thought the match would happen because Seth forgot to clean his room and do his chores.

Instead, we get the match–but it’s for John’s title. I think Seth’s parents want Seth to grab the US Championship, and leave John a poor mess on a street corner rapping for spare change.

‘Cause that’s basic thuganomics, yo.

Big Show vs. Dean Ambrose turned into ‘skinemax’ on demand.

Seriously. Big Show wasted absolutely no time in ripping his shirt off like he wanted to take him right against the ring post. This of course meant that Dean looked like an awkward cowboy stripper until the rest of the shirt came off.

I’m okay with it.

Big Show slugged Dean across the face .

He stopped that suicide dive mid flight. Good god that was brutal. My face hurts.

Paige taps out to Sasha Banks.

Like a boss, well said JBL.

Rusev gives Lana a dog.

He named it, ‘Dog Ziggler’. Wow, you’ve been in America for too long, too punny.

He also gives her a cold, dead, headless fish named ‘Lana’. Alright, well, that’s disgusting and horrifyingly unsanitary.

As a response, Lana goes to the ring and shows the happy couple who’s boss.

You go girl. It was disgusting, but good job.

New Day entering during Lucha Dragons vs. Los Matadores.

With Xavier holding a sign that says ‘real mega dad of the year’ that points down to Kofi. Now that’s absolutely amazing. Give New Day a sitcom this instant!

Bray sounds like myself on a bad day.

Telling children that their parents don’t love them, overall killing their souls and everything they’ve ever loved. This is amazing.

Seth Rollins broke John’s nose.

What?! Is that mean? I thought it was cool, been awhile since we’ve seen some blood in the ring. I swear I’m not crazy.

Okay fine, it is awfully mean, but still, the shock factor to it! Wow!

So the match must have ended early because of the injury. John of course retained his title, no one interfered with the match….okay, I’ll take it. Seth’s phoenix splash–which is rarely ever used didn’t land, and that’s depressing. Seriously, we see Curtis Axel enter the ring more than we see that beautiful move!

Now, I just can’t wait until SmackDown to hear Seth either whine, or say ‘I broke John Cena’s nose!’, and gloat about that for twenty minutes.

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